From: Swansea South Wales
Height: 5ft 2
Target Weight: 17 stone
I have always had a weight problem. I always remember being bigger than everyone else from a young age. I could never have the same trendy clothes and always felt uncomfortable in my own skin growing up in my teens I felt it held me back in social situations. I've always had a bad relationship with food. I love all types of food. I eat when I am happy and eat when I'm sad. When I am depressed I eat more and binge, then when I realise how much food I've consumed food I eat more.....and the cycle starts again. Food has always been a best friend, in good times and bad times.
When I met my husband in my 20s I started to feel confident, we soon got engaged and started planning our wedding. I lost a couple of stone as most brides do but I remember the night before my wedding thinking I never wanted to be a fat bride and I was. My dress was beautiful but I didn't feel it. It's something that I bitterly regret, looking back now I was so much smaller than what I am now.
We have been married for 5 amazing years but as you do being content and in the honeymoon period my weight soon ballooned to an all-time high. I would buy bigger clothes to conceal my weight, I was ashamed of my body and I couldn't stand to look in the mirror as staring back at me was someone that I didn't recognise. I was diagnosed with arthritis in my spine which was brought on by my rapid weight gain. I could hardly walk and struggled with everyday things like putting on socks and tying up shoes laces. In October 2014, my world, my mum was diagnosed with breast cancer. My whole life was turned upside down, unsure of what the future held for my mum's health and our family I sunk in to a deep depression and couldn't work or face anything. As it had before, food made me forget things for a while. I was consuming a ridiculous amount of calories and would drink at least one bottle of wine a night. My weight was slowly killing me.
In the January of 2015 I went to Las Vegas on holiday, I could hardly walk and felt so ashamed of my body. Sitting on the plane, to my horror, I had to get an extender belt for that 11 hour flight. I made a promise to myself that when I returned I was going to get fit and healthy. My husband and I were desperate for a baby and I had to do everything in my power to change my life and get fit. When I returned I joined a gym, got a personal trainer and started to succeed. I liked the way my body felt and the changes that were happening. I was doing so well. I was in a good mind set, looking forward to the future and staying committed and motivated in my weightless loss journey. My family holiday was booked and I had something to aim for. After the trying year we had with my mum's health we so desperately needed a holiday and a break. Unfortunately, on the 26th June 2015 myself and family were caught up in the terrorist attack in Tunisia. We escaped with our lives and injuries to our feet from running away.
We were traumatised and losing weight no longer felt like a priority at the moment. My attention span was short and motivation was zero. I couldn't think an hour ahead, never mind about diets and exercise. I was anxious and suffered with severe panic attacks.
Despite of all these things I have somehow managed to regain my strength and refocus on the journey I had started. Through all of this I was still desperate to have a baby, and I still am - every day it's all I think about. It makes me feel so mad that I am the one who has done this to my body. I am the one stopping myself from having what I want and that is to be a mother. In November 2016 I was diagnosed with polycystic ovaries and under active thyroid which of course makes losing weight and trying to conceive even harder.My target now is to get down to 17 stone, this is what I need to get to, to be able to start IVF treatment. Of course, I'd like to lose more, but one step at a time. With the support of my husband, my family and the support Forza are giving me with nutritional advice, fitness plans and tailored supplements that are right for me and my goals, I'm more motivated than ever and determined to achieve this target and ultimately my dream of becoming a Mum.